For years I have prayed to be a person of influence — one who as a missionary, a writer and
especially a missionary writer, could point people to Jesus. But with my recent job loss, I realize I may
have been holding too tightly to those identities: missionary, writer and
missionary writer.
The rich young ruler also faced a question of identity -- see
Mark 10:17-27. “Sell all that you
have and give it to the poor,” Jesus instructed him. The young man went away
sad, Mark reports, because he was a man of great wealth.
What if the rich young ruler’s story is more a lesson about holding too tightly to an identity than holding too tightly to
possessions?
All the “relational commands” Jesus mentioned to him — do
not murder, do not steal, do not commit adultery — the man had kept “since his
youth.” He treated people as the law required. But to sell all his possessions?
That would have meant a loss of position, influence and identity.
Although I've taken administrative leave, cleaned out my
desk and am no longer working in the office, my last official day of IMB
employment is Feb. 26. In 17 days when I "graduate from
IMB," I will lose positional influence and identities
I've held for 17 years.
Until those identities were scheduled for extinction, I
didn't realize how tightly I'd been holding on to them.
Oh, sure. I've offered them up numerous times throughout the
years in moments of challenge, frustration or loneliness. "If this isn't what
you want me to do, please show me! I don't have to be a writer!" I
remember saying to God after one particularly brutal editing review. Still, I
stayed.
For the rich young ruler, losing his identity as a person of
wealth and influence was just too big a cost. He went away sad.
How will I respond? Will I walk away
sad? Or will I take the risk to follow Jesus anyway -- devoid of a title
respected in Christian evangelical circles -- into a future He has planned for
my good and His glory? Phrased that way, it's a total no-brainer. My
identity isn't rooted in a title, a task or an organization! My identity is in Christ alone.
"In Christ alone, my hope is found."
I am excited, hopeful and looking forward to this next
season of learning to trust in Him alone. Whatever it is, it's going to be good.
How is God teaching you to trust Him? How have you dealt with issues of identity? I'd love to hear your
stories, too.
Labels: Christian, Communications Center, evangelical, Gospel of Mark, identity, IMB, job loss, missionary, rich young rule, writer
